Today was my last day working at The University of Nottingham as an Application Developer. In just over a week I will be starting a new job as a Senior Digital Developer for the DVSA. A big jump.
This is where the nerves are kicking in. I am about to go into a senior role for the first time. People are going to be looking at me for advice, guidance and to make decisions. Now this isn’t something new for me, I had to do this at the uni. However in that role I had my senior colleague to fall back on or to take the lead in decisions. With the new role I will be that senior so my decisions and thoughts will be carrying more weight. This scares me.
They pretty much fall under 3 catergories…
Am I an imposter?
I don’t think it will come as a shock to those that know me to learn I suffer from imposter syndrome. I bet most of them already know. I think thats the main reason I am nervous. Do I know enough to be going into the role? Will I be able to answer the questions people will ask? Can I help mentor people?
Am I too young?
I am 27. Only just an adult really. I have been working in the industry 6 years. Barely any time at all. Has this given me enough knowledge and experience to be able to call myself a senior? Have I been in the industry long enough to justifiably advise people how we should work or how we should develop software?
Do i deserve it?
This is going to be my 4th job in the industry and I am already going to be a calling myself a senior. This doesn’t seem right. Surely I should have had at least several jobs across different industries before I can call myself a senior? Have I paid my dues?
Rays of hope
So while I may be nervous about this new role there are some things that are helping me realise it isn’t going to be a total disaster.
I have some great friends who are already seniors in the industry who I know will be there to support me and answer any questions I have. No matter how stupid they might be. Hopefully they know who they are and realse how much I appreciate their support.
This isn’t so much my own belief but of those around me. During the application process when I didn’t believe I stood a chance these people did and they told me. Repeatedly. Without them I think I would just be doubting myself repeatedly.
Its not all gloom
So yes, I am nervous but I am also extremely excited. This is going to be an exciting new challenge which I can’t wait to tackle. I am going to be joining a great team full of amazing oppertunities. I am going to get to play with new technologies, have access to training and really take my skills to the next level. I can’t wait. Although my week off better not go too fast!